33 Subtle Signs Someone You Love Is Suffering From Depression
1. Stumbling over an answer if they are asked what they did for the weekend or for their day off etc. Often because they did nothing but lie in bed and stare at a wall and don’t now have a reasonable happy interesting answer ready for your innocent question.
2. They have lost interest in things that they are passionate about.
3. If one of their ‘hobbies’ is sleeping. It is very common for people who are depressed to nap constantly and never want to get out of bed.
4. They can’t make decisions because they’re sure every choice will go shitty.
5. It’s a little less common, but sudden bouts of anger and irritability. One of the other things that can sometimes pair up with depression is an intense form of anxiety that stems from a low self-confidence or perceived inadequacy in one’s own abilities.
6. They don’t take care of themselves, sometimes bad hygiene or bad oral health. Tiredness all the time, sometimes sleeping too much or too little.
7. Change in appetite.
8. Someone who deflates as soon as they’re by themselves. They can hold a conversation, attend a party or whatever, but as soon as they’re by themselves or caught outside of a planned social gathering they’re quiet, tired, and seemingly exhausted.
9. They stop talking to everyone. Not in a mean way but just pull away to avoid anyone noticing because pretending to be ok is exhausting, hard, and makes it worse.
10. When they’re always just okay.
11. Being flakey. Cancelling on plans all the time, often last minute and with vague reasons.
12. When they are out and about interacting etc, they often never answer negatively. Ie if you ask someone who is healthy how they are doing they might often tell of their problems along with the ups. But a depressed person is trying so so hard to hide that they are depressed and to maintain an appearance that they will always always answer positively, ‘oh I’m great’ or ‘having such a good day’. Another reason being that often the pretense is the only brief hiatus they will have from their depression for that day.
13. Messy house. Dirty dishes. Empty fridge.
14. They joke around a lot to keep people from digging too deep at how they really feel.
15. If someone does something wrong for them, they don’t complain, they just take what they are given. For example, they get the wrong order at the restaurant and they don’t like what they get but just take it anyway without saying anything.
16. Excessive video watching/social media surfing or video gaming. In short – they don’t see meaning in their life or interaction with others but sink as much time as they have into escapism.
17. A certain lack of response to stimuli. For example, you tell a joke and they either do not smile, or it does not quite meet their eyes.
18. Loss of memory.
19. Muted sense of taste/smell. No enjoyment of food and drinks they used to love.
20. Always smoking weed.
21. Pushing people away. It’s not always obvious but sometimes depressed people don’t want to let anyone in and feel like they’re a burden, so they close themselves off.
22. Dark jokes that are unusual.
23. They don’t do much except work and sleep. They don’t go out, they don’t enjoy things anymore.
24. Guilt. Excessive guilt can be seen in depression.
25. If you ask someone how they are and they hesitate before giving an answer it’s probably them contemplating for that split second if its the right time to tell you about their crippling depression and lack of will to live.
26. When they start giving away stuff that is special to them and not having a good reason why.
27. When every day tasks start to feel like a chore. I know it’s hard to see in somebody else unless you see what their home life is like. But it can come out in simple ways like wanting to make as little effort as possible with things like diet, hygiene, work, socialization, exercise, or self care in general. Like others have said, a depressed person appears really tired.
28. They ‘disappear’; retreating for social interactions, holing up in their room, house or apartment. It sometimes takes people a while to notice someone isn’t there.
29. They are no longer looking forward to anything. A depressed person will just get through events or anything because they have to, not because they want to.
30. When they can’t stand to be touched or hugged anymore.
31. They start to slow down, if you know them really well, you can sometimes see the difference in their eyes. It really hits hard.
32. “I don’t feel very good” is one of my tell tale signs when my depression gets bad. I don’t want to eat because my stomach/chest are in knots and I get so exhausted that I don’t have energy to go out. “I don’t feel good” is just easier to say, so if someone says that a lot then it might be a sign.
33. They are very good at helping others out with this kind of stuff.