I Want Imperfect

I want a love thats imperfect, thats damn messy and complicated and isnt painted to look all pretty and hang on a bedroom wall.

I want a love thats real, on every single level. A love that isnt surfacey, but digs down deep to the gritty parts of our pasts that we try to hide when were feeling nervous or self-conscious about who we are and where weve been.

I want a love that and really each other.

I want a love that is filled with the craziness of falling for someonethe rush at their touch, the stomach flip-flops whenever you see them, the conflict of trying to make them happy but also trying to be true to yourself. I want the arguments about who we are; I want the fights about how the hell two flawed people are going to make this thing work.

See, the world makes love out to be this beautiful thing you jump into, and suddenly, with the right person, all the pieces fit together.

But thats stupid. And I dont want that.

I dont want someone whos going to make me forget all my flaws. My flaws make me the person I am, and even though those parts of me sometimes really suck, theyre still a part of me.

And I dont want someone who hides their true self. Love means seeing who someone really iseven their sucky parts, and loving them just the same, if not more, because of them.

I dont want someone whos going to gloss over the edges and smooth out the wrinkles so we can look pretty on the outside.

I want someone whos going to see me for me, us for us, and work through all that crap to have a love that rather than just looks nice.

I want a love that isnt storybook because Im not a stock character.

Some days Ill be the villain and some days Ill be the protagonist, the one that saves you. Some days Ill drive you crazy, and some days youll fall into my arms because nowhere else has felt so safe, so right.

Some days well feel like ripping each others hair out.
And some days well wonder why we ever fight.

We wont always have it together. We wont always shave the answers. Well go through things that shake us to the core and make us pull away from each other.

But I want that. I want all of that.

I want you on your worst days and I want you to want me on mine.

I want us to learn all the things that make each other nervous, or scared, or angry, or

And I think, what I want most of all, is for us to still choose each other through all of that. And keep choosing each other, day after day after day.

See, I want imperfect love. Not this idealized, make-believe version of how its supposed to be. When I fall in love, I want to crash and be dizzy. I want to be with someone who gets that Im going to cry for no reason sometimes, or want to be alone sometimes, or be damn stubborn sometimes, just because.

I want someone that sees me, in all the millions of souls in the world, and says,

Because were all a little broken.
So lets be broken together.

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