The one who’s faced it, all of it, with stride for so long.
The one whose smile is cracked, but others can’t see it yet.
The one who’s tried to be everyone’s everything that you’ve given no time to yourself.
This is to you.
I’m one of you. I too thought I could handle everything on my own. I didn’t need the help, and even if I did, I sure as hell wasn’t about to ask for it. I thought that if someone else could handle it, I could too.
But she hasn’t faced what I have faced.
She hasn’t given up what I’ve given up.
She isn’t as tired as I am.
It’s not a tired easily cured with a good night’s sleep. It’s a tiring of the heart. It’s a tiring of working for so long for it to feel so unreachable. It’s a tired that feels worse when my eyes close and my mind tries to quiet. It’s a tired that acts as boulders on my chest. It’s a tiring spirit.
If only a cup of coffee could awaken the liveliness that I know is within me. I only wish to feel its familiar warmth in my throat again.
I know it’s there.
But to the you who feels tired of life, I ask one thing of you: wait. Give yourself time because even you know that the sunset is most beautiful when you wait for it. You will illuminate with all the colors you’ve missed soon enough.
You don’t have to worry about that. One day far from now, you’ll look back and realize that blues make beautiful portraits too.
It won’t be like this forever. I promise you that.