Why You Have To Make Him Sweat It Out In The Friend Zone First
Everything is fast-paced these days. A guy meets a chick, he gets her number, they exchange a few messages and by the weekend they’re goingout for drinks. After a few rounds, he flirts intensely with her and she flirts back. Things happen.
Thats the way we court nowadays. And its frightening.
However, if youre looking for something serious, you have to take things slow to get to really know his intentions. You dont want to become another statisticsome girl he slept with that he mentionsoffhandedly tohis friendsbeforethey knuckle punch and carry on, laughing.
When you meet a guy and you have a good feeling about him, let himprove that he can be patient. He cant meet you for the very first time on Wednesday and automatically expect to land a date that coming weekend. Hellno. He needs to show you that hes not just into you for a quick fixto prove that he can be more. That hecan be a friend, too. However long that takes.
So, before you go on any dates, put him in the friend zone and see how he copes. While in the zone, he should be trying to understandevery little thing about you. What makes you smile, what your ambitions and greatest insecurities are, what’s inscribed on your bucket list, etc.Overtime, youll be able to assesif hes genuine, or if hes just to be interested because he has ulterior motives.
Time is the ultimate test.
Now, boys will be boys, and if hes really into you, its only natural for him to want to ask you outhes human, after all. And its probably natural for you to feel pressured into accepting.But if youre not fully comfortable with him, its in your best interest to politely decline. And if he doesnt respect your decision, he’s not worth it anyway. Don’t feelsorry for him, and don’t cave in justbecause youre afraid hemightmove on. If he gives up that easily, then hes not in it for the long haul.
On the contrary, if he accepts your decision and demonstrates willingness to developafriendship with you, then maybe, just maybe, hedeserves to take you out. But remember, long-term relationships require patience, so he still hasaway to go.
Onceyoure convinced thathe possessesthequalities you admire in a friend, let himgraduate from the friend zoneso he cantake you out on a proper date. Although youre probably head over heels for theguy,this of course does not mean that you automatically open up the flood gates for physical stuff. Trust me, for him to truly appreciate you, he has to work his ass off, even for a kiss.
Hypothetically speaking, lets say a tennis player is preparing for the U.S. Open. He trainedhis ass off in the preseason and ends upwinning the entire tournament. Now imaginethat same player being awarded the winningtrophy without even playing a single match. Do you think thattrophy wouldmean much to him?
Lets be clear, its not about playing hard to get or anything like that. The bottom line is this:Allsuccessful marriages are rooted instrong friendships. Let him prove his worth as a friend before you give him a chance to connect with you on a whole new level.
